
Friday, October 13, 2006
Hmm

The weather in Toronto

Hear that lonesome whipper-wind
It's going to make me fly
The whining wind is gearing up
I'm so cold that I could die
I've never seen a wind so strong
When I can only crawl
The sun just went behind the cloud
To hide it's face and cry
Did you ever hear an uncle weep
When the wind begins to rise
That means I've lost the will to live
I'm so cold that I could die
The swiftness of the rising wind
freezes up my ruddy cheeks
As I wonder how long I've got
Before I lay down and die.
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Uncle don's top ten trite sayings

10. "you only live once". I actually used this not that long ago on someone. They felt better for two and a half seconds.
09. "a bird in hand is better than two in the bush". If it's pigeons I'll take two in the bush anytime.
08. "save it for a rainy day". Some persons latch onto that concept. I'm not one of them.
07. "sticks and stones can break my bones.....". Wouldst it be that simple. Words can be a lot more painful.
06. "giving is better than receiving". Well, if I had to choose one, I'd pick receiving.
05. "nothing ventured, nothing gained". Hello. Isn't that fairly obvious to anyone with half a brain.
04. "the early bird get's the worm". Personally, I haven't developed a taste for worms yet so I'll let the early birds have them.
03. "where there is a will there a way". I'd like to kill the person who came up with this saying. One needs a lotta luck and determination and will. None of which I particularly have.
02. "a friend in need is a friend indeed". This makes a little sense.
01. "absence makes the heart grown fonder". Amen
Hey

Kevin will hate this but I consider him one of the great persons of all time. Other than morning and lunch and pretty well all the time before and after. The poor baby. Hello: "we have to be quiet during lunch hour because Kev's home and he needs his soup and nap" Hello, the rest of world doesn't need a soup and nap, why does he? Because he is feeding the pigs. He doesn't have any pigs. I know Uncle Don but he has to feed them.
"What else is ascue with Kev neet?" "He likes to get up naked and eat at 3 am" "thus the soup and nap later on in the day?" "yes" "it would be so easy to smother him in his sleep wouldn't it, especially around 12:15"
And Kevin writes down our score before we throw the darts. That annoys me. If one has any sense of rules, do not go to Kevins. Cribbage should not be tinkered with but he does. Although I'm not very good at card games. I think I have a brain but apparently not when it comes card games. But thank God Kevin adapts to my low level of thinking: "yes uncle don you can play that card but try to remember this is darts we are playing". And it is nice to see Ger and Justin together. I'm not sure if anyone appreciates them as much as me. Of course anyone that does 'get' them is loony and crazy and mixed-up and should be put away for 25 years minimum. And should have their head examined.
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Neil

This is Kara. Isn't she cute.
I certainly have probs with Neil. He's okay but really he's not that great. I personally wouldn't tell anyone that he is great. I'm not sure Neil is even okay. With a lot of self-improvement Neil could attain okay status. But he's got to work on his mustache. It needs work.
Bob's mustache is not bad, Ger's is plausible. Uncle Don's is just coming into it's own. But the Storm/Douville handbook does say that the youngest male child must have a mustache so it's not really Neil's fault.

So this is the opening salvo (and I kind of wish I was kidding): of course I'll enjoy the family and the party. If anyone wants to go on a whitewater weekend sign me me up.
Not to say I don't enjoy the Moyie, having the family together is good (especially when Kev hides and Justin and Col drive off in a fit and everyone gets annoyed, it's all a rerun to me). And really to put Karri-man and Loretta down. I personally liked what they brought out. I think they get it more than us.
But that's us, I wouldn't have it any other way. It's all perfect to me. Completely. But I remember one time I was taking inventory west of Caroline Alberta at about six in the morning. And I saw a deer just when the sun was arising. I turned the radio off and watched and listened for about an hour.
Friday, October 06, 2006
Yay
A post mortem

Thursday, October 05, 2006
The Toronto Maple Loafs
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Yay

They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you're chewing life's gristle,
Don't grumble, Give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best.
And...Always look on the bright side of life.
if life seems jolly rotten, There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle.
That's the thing.
And...Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the right side of life,
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin. Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.So,
...Always look on the bright side of death,
Just before you draw your terminal breath.
Life's a piece of shit, When you look at it. Life's a laugh and death's a joke it's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go. Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...Always look on the bright side of life.
Kevin
"I may have to kill kevin while we are out there cause you and i both know he is going to do something to deserve it, so if and when you hear from me again it may be kevins funeral, it may be a slow and agonizing death just for my pleasure, so take care and talk at ya later, james"
I feel so much better now. Even his brother has these sudden urges. I thought it was last week they were going hunting but I guess it's this week. For me, burying Kev's body would be the highlight of my life. I think I'm kidding. I think I am. I must be kidding. Aren't I?
More kneecaps
Knees
Hello
Ta da.
Flowers

I like flowers. Tomorrow is October 1. Goodbye flowers, fun and frivolity. The only highlight I can see this month is Thanksgiving Day. Oh and Kevin's birthday. If I had to choose a number representing how old he is going to be I would pick 17, which means Bob would be about 22, Neil would be 16 and I would be 29.
I don't know why I think of a Elvis bobbing head doll when I think of Kevin. If at all possible, try to make his life hell on his birthday. If one person could do that I would bestow on him/her the Medal of Achievement For Making Kevin's Life Hell, which I just I had minted.
Jen
Friday, September 29, 2006
My field of dreams

editor's note: I'm thinking I'll be writing a column on this pic as soon as I get my head around what I want to say. Obviously with the mountains in the background the Storm/Douvilles will be in the picture. And none of it will be true. I don't think. We will see.
Thursday, September 28, 2006
From the latest Hockey News

By Matt Canamucio, NHL Editor
The Vancouver Canucks had a glaring need, and they took care of it.
The night before the NHL Entry Draft, Canucks GM Dave Nonis pulled the trigger on a deal that acquired goaltender Roberto Luongo and defenseman Lukas Krajicek from Florida in exchange for controversial winger Todd Bertuzzi, goaltender Alex Auld and defenseman Bryan Allen.
The Canucks' issues in net appear to be over for the time being, as Luongo then signed a four-year, $27 million contract with the club.
In getting Luongo, Vancouver didn't just make a feeble attempt to fix the netminding issues. The club acquired a guy who is one of the few goalies in the NHL you can truly call elite.
In dealing Bertuzzi, the Canucks, while they lost a tremendous offensive weapon, did themselves and the player a favor by separating from the distraction that still lingered from something that happened 2 1/2 years ago.
Of course, the moves hardly ended with this trade. Head coach Marc Crawford was replaced by Alain Vigneault, defenseman Ed Jovanovski and winger Anson Carter left via free agency and a number of other players were replaced.
A season ago the Canucks finished with 92 points, but failed to make the playoffs in the highly-competitive Western Conference. The team was slammed by injuries, especially on defense, and that ultimately proved to be what kept it out of the postseason.
Now, the roster has been shaken up and 05-06 is history. The goaltending upgrade was made at the offense's expense, so it's now a matter if that formula can work or not.
FORWARDS - Bertuzzi's departure leaves a gaping hole on the right side of the top line, but captain Markus Naslund still skates on the left side. Naslund and Bertuzzi developed quite a chemistry in recent years, at one point forming the league's most dangerous duo. Naslund has tallied at least 30 goals in each of the last five seasons, but hasn't reached 40 since bagging 48 in 2002-03. Can he get back to being a 100-point player without a physical force like Bertuzzi on his line?
Playmaker Brendan Morrison has been the resident center on the top line, and he is typically good for between 35 and 45 assists per year. As for who will replace Bertuzzi on the right side, it looks like it will be feisty agitator Matt Cooke. Cooke has been a third-line guy who scores goals in the teens, but he did fill in for Bertuzzi when he was suspended for his attack on Steve Moore back in 2004.
Twins Daniel and Henrik Sedin both finally broke out of their shells with 70- point seasons last year, and they will again anchor the second line. The hope is that newcomer Jan Bulis, who scored 20 goals for Montreal last season, can be consistent enough to be their regular right wing.
Keep an eye on former first-round pick Ryan Kesler, who was signed to an offer sheet by Philadelphia this summer. The Canucks matched the one-year, $1.9 million deal and re-signed him. Kesler was a 30-goal guy in the AHL during the lockout, but managed only 10 tallies and 13 assists in 82 games for the Canucks last season.
DEFENSE - With Jovanovski gone the team lost a bona fied anchor. Nonis signed the hard-hitting Willie Mitchell during free agency, and Mattias Ohlund and Sami Salo return.
Overall, this is a very thin group, which would spell disaster if injuries hit like they did last season. Last March, Nonis was forced to obtain players like Keith Carney, Sean Brown and Eric Weinrich, and none of them are back.
An x-factor in this group is Krajicek, who was a first-round pick back in 2001. He has been pegged for stardom since that time, but hasn't lived up to the billing. The flash and skill he showed as a junior player hasn't revealed itself on the NHL level, and last season was his first as somewhat of a regular player. In 67 games for the Panthers in 05-06 he managed two goals and 14 assists and was a plus-1.
GOALTENDING - Luongo is coming from a situation in Florida where he was peppered with around 35 shots -- or more -- on a regular basis. In 75 games last season he finished 35-30-9 with a 2.97 goals-against average and .914 save percentage.
Even with the losses of key defensemen, it's very doubtful that Luongo will see as many pucks as he did with the Panthers.
If he stays healthy, which has never been a problem, Luongo should post another 65-70-appearance season. Mika Noronen, who was acquired from Buffalo at the trade deadline, decided to play overseas instead of being a rarely-used backup, so veteran Wade Flaherty will likely be the understudy.
WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE - The Canucks turned over a decent portion of their roster, but will it work? Luongo was the upgrade of all upgrades, but, as he proved in Florida a stud goaltender cannot carry a team to the playoffs all by himself.
Now, instead of having questions in goal the team has questions up front and on defense. How those questions are answered will determine whether or not the Canucks will again be outside the playoff field, or whether they can squeeze in as a seventh or eighth seed.
Monday, September 25, 2006
Hi

Sunday, September 24, 2006
The Ryder Cup
I worry

But I shouldn't worry. Hello. I should probably worry more about them accidently killing each other. I presume Kevin will be naked for the week and out hunting at 3am. I've never seen him carry a gun with clothes on in the daylight, I hope it isn't too nippy. I shouldn't worry too much though, Jim's e-mail to me:
"Actually it is kevin, colin and I hunting for a week, next week actually. Staying in a travel trailer, hot tub, granny made up cabbage rolls, beef stew, chicken pot pies, etc, should be good!"
Let's get together here: remember the days when Jim would go out alone and spend 12 days sitting in one spot while waiting for a deer to appear? And now he's got a hot tub, travel trailer and cabbage rolls? What happened to our fearless hunter? I'm an old fashioned person and a hunting trip should entail a little bit of deprivation. But not with Jim anymore apparently. If I ever cross the Gobi Desert I want Jim with me. I assume by the end of the week the deer will be in the hot tub and the three muskateers will be lost somewhere in the woods.
If I ever go on a hunting trip there are two persons whom I wouldn't want with me: Kevin and Colin. One can assume that the wildlife are dancing around and clapping their hooves with glee knowing those two persons are on the way to their forest.
The week from Colin's perspective:
Day one: "Gee Dad this is fun, when do we get to leave?" "Shaddup and keep loading the gear. How many rocket launchers have you uncrated?" "one" "throw it in the trunk" "then there will be no room for the Wiser's". "forget the rocket launcher, the grenade launcher will have to do, did you remember our swimming trunks for the hot tub, and don't forget the sour cream for the cabbage rolls, and above all don't forget the wine glasses, oh yeah and the camoflauge outerwear and your Bud" "I think I'm going to have fun roughing it Dad and to think we are going hunting with a famous hunter like Uncle Jim" "exactly, have we got room for an E-Z Boy?"
Day two: "Dad?" "yes" "I don't see Uncle Jim, it's 5am, can he be out hunting already?" "possibly, he does like to reconoiter" "Dad isn't that a nice deer over there, a six pointer I would say, why is he not afraid of us?" "he knows we aren't going to shoot him, but if that was a cat I could shoot it" "we are on a deer hunting trip aren't we Dad?" "yes" "that is a deer" "true" "but we aren't going to shoot it?" "are you crazy or something?" "I'm confused"
Day three: "Dad?" "yes" Uncle Jim has been sitting behind that bush since we told him Chuck the Six Pointer was in camp and he hasn't moved since" "ignore him, turn up the temp on the hot tub and pass me another chicken pot pie" "what if Chuck appears and Jim shoots him?" "what are the chances of that?" "remote"
Day four: "Dad" "yes" "do you like eating deer?" "no, it's too gamey for me" "Chuck agrees with you" "where is he by the way I haven't seen Chuck or Jim for a few days" "I'm not sure, Uncle Jim said something about tracking spoors and Chuck has gone to the high country for a few days to visit his friends, the bighorn sheep" "I miss Chuck"
The Classic Series











Yay

'New Denver was great! We went the night before and stayed at a B & B - very quiet old, big farmhouse. The garlic fest was extremely busy with about 7,000 people thru the gates. We sold just under 400 lbs of garlic and even a few onions. We are now into hockey season - Karen and I have both started playing with our teams. Marcel on the midget rep team for his last year, and he's also playing on the school volleyball team. They won their first tourny of the year last weekend here. Nice to see him play well. Next year at this time we'll be empty-nesters. Hard to believe. Colleen is in Regina this weekend at a big college tourny'.
I tend to think of Marlene and Anna and them telling me how difficult it was to see the last one go. Can anyone imagine Gail leaving home? Well, I would have killed myself. And Julie? I couldn't survive.
I certainly will regret it when the Canucks lose this year. We've got Roy, Kev, Col and Robin to consider, and dear departed Max. But I'm cheering for the Maple Loafs. I know I'm a softie and can be cajoled into almost anything by my nephews, but I will not switch allegiance.
I just want to say a special hello to Anita and Ty. Good people.
Saturday, September 23, 2006
The Family

Hi Kev
Imagine (thanks John)
Friday, September 22, 2006
An optical illusion



I presume it is an optical illusion that it is Friday. I hope not. I took a new route home from work on my bike tonight. I enjoy seeing parts of TO that I never have seen before in my twenty-some years of living here. Of course the problem being is that I'm in rush hour traffic so I don't get a lot of chances to look around and gawk at the surroundings. I guess because I leave for work at 7am and Toronto is a 9-5 city but gawd the difference between biking to work and biking home is quite different. Up until a couple of weeks ago I enjoyed the bike to work more because it was a hell of a lot more peaceful (a lot less traffic). It's been a subtle and gradual change but now I enjoy the bike home more. I don't think that is particularly a good thing. I'm kind of getting to be a maniac on two wheels (if it's possible for a sixty-year old person to be a maniac). Of course many cyclists still wizz by me It doesn't bother me too much really. I'm not great, speed-wise, at going up the three steep hills that I encounter going to and from work. But fewer cyclists are passing me now. Not bad, I guess, for a sixty-one year old guy who loves his family from afar. Which is not a bad thing. I could of course just catch a bus out there on the spur of the moment and arrive on one of my family member's doorsteps: "hi, it's moi" "whom?" "moi" "hi uncle don, are you passing through?". "not really, I'm here to stay" "where?" "here" "for how long?" "forever" "forever?" "well at least until I pass away" "how long will that be?" "my heart is palpalating so it could be any minute now"
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Wierd People

Jim likes to think that the July long weekend is an outdoor adventure. It is that. But when me and Kevin canoe by the crowd because it's too raucous, you know it's a party too.
Being from Toronto and living the hustle and bustle, it would not be a bad thing to experience the quietude of the Moyie and just listening to nature. So far it hasn't happened. Which is a good thing of course.
But a couple of canoes (at the most) and peace and quiet would be nice too someday. Just me and the river and a bald eagle. When I bike to work I think how nice that would be.
Agh

I put off the doctor's appointment again until next month. I think I was supposed to go in April and I keep putting it off. What is she going to tell me? I presume it will be quit smoking, drinking beer and ogling young women. I have to have a bit of fun don't I? I suppose if I have to I can quit the beer and cigarettes. If my eyes go then I jump off the nearest tall building.
I sometimes wonder if I shouldn't at least remember one of these pictures being taken. I don't remember Ger even having a camera with him. I remember him talking. That I remember. Ger seems to have the inordinate talent of capturing uncles in wierd poses.
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Hello

The string theory


Hello

Friday, September 15, 2006
A touch of class

..and a little 'touched'

And I was thinking at the time, which really put me out of the running for The Great Grand Poobah.
Neil

Neil is wondering what that funny-looking, hairy creature walking up the other side of the mountain is. He's thinking it's either a yeti or the snow-blindness combined with the high-altitude lack of oxygen he's experiencing.
Isn't he cute? (Neil, not the Yeti)