Northern Norway

Here are two of six pictures Arne Ulriksen sent me yesterday of Northern Norway. I met him at the airport in Toronto when I was flying to Calgary and he was coming from Saskatoon and going back home to Norway. I can see why.

I'm back in Toronto, yippee (hello). That was an enjoyable week seeing everyone. It was fairly uneventful which is a good thing (although I'll probably be able to come up with a few highlights this friday). Lorraine, Bob and I had a snack and a beer at Cheers Pub at the airport in Calgary before I left for Toronto. Wow it felt good to crawl into bed at 2am Monday morning. The subway was working at that time of the day, although I did have to walk home from the subway.

Later

The baby and friends

I've got the greatest family in the history of mankind. Some of them may be odd, strange and/or wierd but they are great. Of course I'm thinking about the nine nieces and nephews I have and the two brothers. And wives. And kids. Kinda special every one of them.

I was crabby last week at work. It felt good. I don't think anyone noticed which made me even more crabby. I expect the world to notice when I'm crabby, but normally it doesn't. But, in the remote chance I live in Creston, I'll know Ger is crabby twelve miles away: 'Ger's crabby' 'how do you know that uncle don' 'I can tell' 'how?' 'think about virgos: 9999999.99% of the time we are either thinking about being crabby, are crabby, or are just getting over being crabby. Do the math, he's crabby'

'when can we approach Ger to ask him for a donation to the Creston Library Charitable Fund for Aged Uncles (CLCFAU)?' 'he doesn't read' 'he doesn't read?' 'not that I've noticed' 'everyone reads' 'not Ger' 'we shouldn't go to his door for contributions?' 'I wouldn't' 'but he's the only one left in Creston to ask, we need another $16.96' 'that is a problem, we could hide behind his spa and talk about Shakepeare' 'he'd dump hot water on us' 'we could recite parts of the Da Vince Code to him while he's having a shower' no we can't, I hate that book, let's do Homer's Iliad' 'whom?' 'quiet, the CFCFAU is thinking' (Roy should we storm his place and just take the $16.96 or should we just kill him, I'm for the killing, but he's your son, your option). 'we've come up with a plan' 'give us $10,000 for the fund' 'huh?' 'you don't have to, but one our CLCFAU members (not mentioning any names) has volunteered to torture Ger for seventeen days. And after that he will be dipped in a fat free vat and be served at McDonald's as wholesome food' 'okay, okay here's the $16.96'.

Yay, Roy now we can read again.

Theo, Olivia and Zack

To everyone: Bob has got a great blog. www.bobstorm.com. It's my favourite. And where else will you see the cutest of kids.

I amended to the 'my first ski trip' below.

These are pics of Neil and Kara from a few years ago. Neil titled them 'high ropes'. Has anyone noticed but me that his pics tend towards the death defying? Hello. You can't tell in this pic that Neil is cute, but trust me his.

Egad, that was quite a day. Shouldn't life get easier, at least slightly? Stop this world I gotta get off. And I need protection from myself. How I managed to live this long I'll never know; pure, unadulterated luck. Today was more or less typical, although maybe a little worse. It didn't start out too good. I always measure out the coffee, pour water into the percolator and then push the start button just before I step into the shower. Unfortunately I didn't put the coffee pot under the spout. Thank good gawd I have a small coffee maker so it wasn't a terrible mess when I returned from the shower. At least I had something to do (clean up) while waiting for the next pot of coffee to finish percolating. Boy that's not a good way to start a day. I was skittish for the rest of the day, in fact my nerves were shot.

And the day didn't improve after that. The other big lowlight of the day was having two of those young men dressed in suits get on my subway car on the way home and one of them sitting next to me and asking me if I've seen the light: 'the whom?' 'the light that will shine on you if you take the right path' 'the only light I see is the one at the end of the tunnel and that is pretty dim at the moment' 'aha sir, well you can be saved' 'from what?' 'hell' 'I'm in hell right now, I'm talking to you and could you possibly just try to save someone else's soul today, I'm just not really in the mood, meet me here this upcoming Monday morning and we'll discuss Hell in detail' 'thank you sir, it's been nice talking to you sir, be well sir (they are polite)' 'thank you'.

The only small highlight of the day was talking to a woman in Vancouver: 'sorry Don I don't have time to talk to you, I'm doing year-end and it's snowing' 'you are in Vancouver it can't be snowing' 'what's the temperature in Toronto, ten above?' 'thirteen' 'what's going on Don, is the world coming to end?' "no, relax it's just evens out once in a while, Toronto always suffers, year after year, but this year Vancouver is suffering, remember the ice storm we had a couple of years ago?' 'but we've been hit bad this year Don, the trees in Stanley Park are flattened, I haven't been able to bike for weeks on end and my crocuses are wiped out' 'I'm in deep in sympathy, take care and I'll get back to you in a month or two'. Weather bonded two Canadians together for a few moments who were geographically far apart. I talk to persons every day, all day on the phone and it is amazing to me how much Canadians love this country, from coast-to-coast. It can be very subtle, or not. Of course during the World Cup soccer which is held every four years, it's obvious that all people love their country but Canadians, it seems to me, are more subtle but yet more compassionate in a way that others don't get.

We are completely unique, we have a lot of land and not so many people. We are the second largest country in the world after Russia by area, and the 36th largest by population. Russia has 142 million people, we have 33 million. Wherever we are in Canada, we should be pleased, from the mountains of B.C. to the prairies of Saskatchewan to the Canadian Shield and the Niagara Region of Ontario. From the Gatineau region of Quebec to the shores of the Atlantic Ocean. Think about it.

I don't know where that came from, but if one hasn't seen it, one should. It's an amazing country, to me at least.

As another year is closing, may this blog thank a few persons: Ger, his pics were unreal; Bob, he sent pics that touched me; Robin, wow; Neil, wow. Julie, wow. Thank you, you made my year and I appreciate you guys taking the time. And I got to write which I needed to do.

This is probably a unique blog, it's one that is based on family and letting an uncle write to his hearts content. A win-win situation if there ever was one.

I did not want to bring this up. But I must. This was at the time that Jim was working with Ken and Glen. And me and him skiied all the time. This little cute person moved up to Calgary. I chose that day to somehow ski without fear: "whom is that?" "your uncle" "He's rockin'" Me and Jim and Kev sat in the apres ski bar and while they played pool I basked in the feeling of contentment.

That is one day everything came together. To me, I only had it once, you get the knees and mind in sync and It's an amazing thing. I get that on my bike all the time. That is why I bike. One is on the edge and you bike along and the wind and everything is with you. Skiing is so good that way, and so is biking, at least for me. And especially in Toronto. Biking along the lakeshore is unreal. It's flat and the bike path is perfect. I grumble that Toronto doesn't do enough for cyclists but it's pretty good.

uncle don's first ski trip

Of course I could talk about my first 'ski' trip: "Marlene and Leo and Anna and Roy and assorted children, I'm so pleased to have you staying in Calgary with me but I'm not going skiing, Gail quit hanging on my leg". "we love you uncle don" "when do we leave?".

I should never have fallen for those words but I did, thank goodness, although not that day. May I add that I had never donned a pair of skis in my life while my dearest rest of the family (drotf) had several trillion times: 'uncle don this is going to be fun, don't be angst-ridden, we will look after you'. 'I need to be looked after?'

After waiting in line for skis and boots for two or three hours, oh and poles, I'm ready: 'aahh this isn't bad, my back isn't hurting that bad, and why are those chairs moving?'. "we have to sit on them to get on top of the ski hill" "what's this run called Roy?" "Strawberry" "sounds dangerous" "Leo do you love me?" "of course" "so it's the three of us on that moving chair going up to that great divide?" "yes"

So somehow I managed to get on the chair with Roy and Leo and I felt some comfort in that. In fact we chatted a little while I was trying to get comfortable: 'don, look yonder, look at that person doing the moguls" "moguls?" "bumps, gawd your stupid" "I know" "we are getting off soon so tips up" "my tips have been up since we left" "put them more up" "I can't put them more up, if I put them more up they would be touching my forehead" "By the way Roy and Leo, my life is flashing before my eyes, but I see Gail and Julie and Marlene and Robin up there and they seem happy" "of course" "I've forgotten words to the Lords Prayer" "you'll be okay".

The one great thing about ski lifts that hold three persons is that the person in the middle (moi) can usually survive: "ooh sorry Leo, I'm sorry you fell and the ski pole is imbedded in your innards. Agh Roy, I didn't mean to throw you over that cliff, you will rejoin us soon won't you"

The whole family was completely patient with me for quiet a while. Jim, Robin, Ger, Neil, and Kev stopped by for a moment or two whilst I was thinking I'm dead. Leo and Roy were somewhat less friendly having just recovered there spills. I assumed that Marlene and Anna would spend a few hours with me while I contemplated the beautiful surroundings before I moved a muscle: "we have to join our family don, and we paid for this" That was Anna. From Marlene of course I expected better: 'don, you can move' 'down?' Eventually Marlene even gave up. I was the worst fucking speciman of a skiier that ever hit the slopes. Ever. By a thousand times. Eventually two little cuties by the name of Gail and Julie showed up and got me down the hill. I could have been there until the snow melted. They took charge of me and got me down.

I don't remember anything after that, I was just so pleased to be at the bottom. It worked out well, I didn't die.

I personally think this a great, great pic. I never made it to Red Mountain. Look in the background. That is amazing. This is what life all about. As regards his guitar playing...we will see.

'We had Dad and Carol over and Karens parents and Chris and Donna and their kids. 13 around one table - lots of work, but it was a good visit with everyone. I got a really cool guitar book from Colleens boyfriend so now there's no looking back. Also, my buddy from Nelson is going to give me some help. He's an accomplished player - used to play in a band.
We went skiing over at Red Mountain in Rossland on Friday and Saturday with Colleen and her boyfriend Cody, and Marcel and his girlfriend Kyla. We had a couple of inches of new snow and sunshine all day on Friday, and then about 5 inches of fresh on Saturday and snow all day. Excellent skiing! I'll try to attach a pic.
Have a happy new year.'
Robin'

I'm slightly starting to get worried. Robin doesn't mind the Canucks (did anyone notice they went from eleventh to first place in one game?). The thing is that his midrift is getting large. I hope that's the sweater and not his rotund bod.

Of course Karen is as cute as ever. I've always noticed she has long arms. With Robin she can only get them half way around his bod.

Even though one can't see them anymore, his dimples are still there. These two are cuties.

If this isn't the cutest family in the history of mankind I don't what is. Wow.

I do hope no one is looking here for a forecast of any sort. I've got a headache. If I had to forecast something I'd say that most of my family will annoy me at some point in 2007. I've got serveral new years resolutions. The first one is I'm okay, however annoying Kevin is, I will not kill him. I will throw him over the deck and drop hot barbecue coals on him but I won't actually slit his throat. Oh yes, I will laugh at Ger's jokes even if it kills me which they may. Let's not talk about Jim. Not while his war wounds are still healing.

Give me a day or two before I give a forecast for 1997. I'm thinking about it. Obviously it won't be good. Roy phoned me and asked me phone him. I have no idea what his phone number might be. Hello, I can't remember what he looks like and I'm going remember his phone number? I don't write things down. Well I do, but I seem to throw them out almost immediately. I pretty well phone Kevin every weekend and I still have to look up his phone number. Please don't put me down, I've already done it a thousand times. I'm beloved by some in Toronto: the homeless, I don't give them money, I spout Proust to them and they usually move on.

So I parked my bike for the season. So my defences are down. So am I good at anything? Greg brought down the greatest meal in the history of mankind. Turkey with all trimmings, I've family there that loves me: thank you Greg, the stuffing and gravy and mashed potatatoes travelled well. Greg lives about three blocks from me and his Mom and Dad in the "far burbs". I think he's got the cutest mom in the history of mankind other than my own. She is Aboriginal and she was born in the same year and month as me. Can older persons be beautiful? Yes. Jean at work is my age too. She has silvery hair and she is beautiful. What is the word: Classy. When I first started at Market Probe I was afraid to approach her because of her 'statleliness" if that makes sense. Now we are so close. And she is just as forgetful as me, if not more so. We could be twins.

Next Friday morning I will do the 2007 forecast. 2007? I've got to kill myself. I was born in 1945. I'm not doing the math but agh that is a few years ago. Hello. I want to be preserved in amber. Scientists discovered fossils and plant life that formed trillions of years ago preserved in amber. Why not me? It wouldn't be bad thing. I'll actually wear a suit so I'm presentable. "Uncle Don we are not preserving you in amber" "why not?" "because you jumped off a tall building and your remains are spread around the block and your dna is lost" "I like riverbeds, I won't jump, I'll go to a riverbed and slowly rot" "you have to be near a tree" "why?" "because the sap in the tree turns into amber after a billion years" "can we speed it up a bit?" "and then the sap in the tree has to engulf your bod which take centuries, if not millenia.

I'm a weirdo, I guess you all know that by now. Take care everyone. Life isn't bad at all.

Dad's retirement from the sawmill and a picture at Christmas. These pictures would bring a tear to my eye. I miss him.

This is an amazing picture. I took this one I think (obviously). Down at the farm. One can sure tell Dawn is Bob's daughter in this picture.

Dad

Pretty classy looking guy to me. Of course I'm slightly biased. I don't think the world will ever see me and Bob putting Dad down. He had his faults of course. He might have been slightly cheap. We had to share tv dinners. And we may have had the worst lunch in the world when we went to school (toast with peanut butter). And we won't talk about his snuff. And he read the paper from front to back but yet he never talked about current events. He loved being in a car and watching the scenery go by.

And mom who was totally different. And they had a child every four or five years or so. Me and Bob could have had the strangest upbringing in the history of mankind. When we were down at the 'farm' we had to walk miles just to get to the nearest school bus stop. We must have loved Mom dearly. And it was tough on me because sometimes I didn't know where Bob was. It was confusing. I worried. Someone had to.

I'm not sure where my angst-ridden self comes from. I might have been adopted. In Pincher Creek it's easy to mix up babies: "Mrs. Storm, we have this child whom is threatening to jump off the hospital roof, would you take him?" "is he cute?" "a little" "is he pink?" "yes" "why is he threatening to jump?" "his pablum wasn't room temperature." "that's a problem?" "he thinks so".