Saturday, September 30, 2006

Yay


Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you're chewing life's gristle,
Don't grumble, Give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best.
And...Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the light side of life.
if life seems jolly rotten, There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle.
That's the thing.
And...Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the right side of life,
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin. Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.So,
...Always look on the bright side of death,
Just before you draw your terminal breath.
Life's a piece of shit, When you look at it. Life's a laugh and death's a joke it's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go. Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...Always look on the bright side of life.

Kevin

I sometimes thinks its just me whom would like to kill Kev. Apparently not:

"I may have to kill kevin while we are out there cause you and i both know he is going to do something to deserve it, so if and when you hear from me again it may be kevins funeral, it may be a slow and agonizing death just for my pleasure, so take care and talk at ya later, james"

I feel so much better now. Even his brother has these sudden urges. I thought it was last week they were going hunting but I guess it's this week. For me, burying Kev's body would be the highlight of my life. I think I'm kidding. I think I am. I must be kidding. Aren't I?

More kneecaps

I have to get in the running for the Kneecap of the Year Award so here is mine. The deadline for entries is October 31st. The front runners at the moment are Donna and Bob with Leo and Roy tied for a distant third.

Knees



Now of course Leo is showing off his kneecaps. I don't know what it is about the Storm/Douville family. Ooh and so are Donna and Gail. Donna is being a little more blatant about it.

Hello

I'm so glad there is a two and three hour time difference between here and Alberta and B.C. I woke up early and was drinking coffee and couldn't think anything remotely nice to say about my relatives. So I wrote that you were all kinda cute but annoying, brain-dead, and wouldn't have a clue about life. But as I was unlocking my bike to go out and about I realized I was wrong. I rushed up to the computer and deleted the "kinda cute".

Ta da.

Flowers


I like flowers. Tomorrow is October 1. Goodbye flowers, fun and frivolity. The only highlight I can see this month is Thanksgiving Day. Oh and Kevin's birthday. If I had to choose a number representing how old he is going to be I would pick 17, which means Bob would be about 22, Neil would be 16 and I would be 29.

I don't know why I think of a Elvis bobbing head doll when I think of Kevin. If at all possible, try to make his life hell on his birthday. If one person could do that I would bestow on him/her the Medal of Achievement For Making Kevin's Life Hell, which I just I had minted.

Jen


I think everyone should meet her. I really do. She lost her baby and so Kev won't be a grandfather quite yet.
But she is my hero.

Friday, September 29, 2006

My field of dreams

I loved the story and movie of A Field of Dreams. Who wouldn't. In a corn field. This picture could be Jacques Plante and Gump Worseley in goal with Rocket Richard, Turk Broda, Eddie Shore, Doug Bentley, and Lester Patrick playing. I'm thinking it could be.

editor's note: I'm thinking I'll be writing a column on this pic as soon as I get my head around what I want to say. Obviously with the mountains in the background the Storm/Douvilles will be in the picture. And none of it will be true. I don't think. We will see.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

From the latest Hockey News


2006-07 Vancouver Canucks Preview
By Matt Canamucio, NHL Editor

The Vancouver Canucks had a glaring need, and they took care of it.

The night before the NHL Entry Draft, Canucks GM Dave Nonis pulled the trigger on a deal that acquired goaltender Roberto Luongo and defenseman Lukas Krajicek from Florida in exchange for controversial winger Todd Bertuzzi, goaltender Alex Auld and defenseman Bryan Allen.

The Canucks' issues in net appear to be over for the time being, as Luongo then signed a four-year, $27 million contract with the club.

In getting Luongo, Vancouver didn't just make a feeble attempt to fix the netminding issues. The club acquired a guy who is one of the few goalies in the NHL you can truly call elite.

In dealing Bertuzzi, the Canucks, while they lost a tremendous offensive weapon, did themselves and the player a favor by separating from the distraction that still lingered from something that happened 2 1/2 years ago.

Of course, the moves hardly ended with this trade. Head coach Marc Crawford was replaced by Alain Vigneault, defenseman Ed Jovanovski and winger Anson Carter left via free agency and a number of other players were replaced.

A season ago the Canucks finished with 92 points, but failed to make the playoffs in the highly-competitive Western Conference. The team was slammed by injuries, especially on defense, and that ultimately proved to be what kept it out of the postseason.

Now, the roster has been shaken up and 05-06 is history. The goaltending upgrade was made at the offense's expense, so it's now a matter if that formula can work or not.

FORWARDS - Bertuzzi's departure leaves a gaping hole on the right side of the top line, but captain Markus Naslund still skates on the left side. Naslund and Bertuzzi developed quite a chemistry in recent years, at one point forming the league's most dangerous duo. Naslund has tallied at least 30 goals in each of the last five seasons, but hasn't reached 40 since bagging 48 in 2002-03. Can he get back to being a 100-point player without a physical force like Bertuzzi on his line?

Playmaker Brendan Morrison has been the resident center on the top line, and he is typically good for between 35 and 45 assists per year. As for who will replace Bertuzzi on the right side, it looks like it will be feisty agitator Matt Cooke. Cooke has been a third-line guy who scores goals in the teens, but he did fill in for Bertuzzi when he was suspended for his attack on Steve Moore back in 2004.

Twins Daniel and Henrik Sedin both finally broke out of their shells with 70- point seasons last year, and they will again anchor the second line. The hope is that newcomer Jan Bulis, who scored 20 goals for Montreal last season, can be consistent enough to be their regular right wing.

Keep an eye on former first-round pick Ryan Kesler, who was signed to an offer sheet by Philadelphia this summer. The Canucks matched the one-year, $1.9 million deal and re-signed him. Kesler was a 30-goal guy in the AHL during the lockout, but managed only 10 tallies and 13 assists in 82 games for the Canucks last season.

DEFENSE - With Jovanovski gone the team lost a bona fied anchor. Nonis signed the hard-hitting Willie Mitchell during free agency, and Mattias Ohlund and Sami Salo return.

Overall, this is a very thin group, which would spell disaster if injuries hit like they did last season. Last March, Nonis was forced to obtain players like Keith Carney, Sean Brown and Eric Weinrich, and none of them are back.

An x-factor in this group is Krajicek, who was a first-round pick back in 2001. He has been pegged for stardom since that time, but hasn't lived up to the billing. The flash and skill he showed as a junior player hasn't revealed itself on the NHL level, and last season was his first as somewhat of a regular player. In 67 games for the Panthers in 05-06 he managed two goals and 14 assists and was a plus-1.

GOALTENDING - Luongo is coming from a situation in Florida where he was peppered with around 35 shots -- or more -- on a regular basis. In 75 games last season he finished 35-30-9 with a 2.97 goals-against average and .914 save percentage.

Even with the losses of key defensemen, it's very doubtful that Luongo will see as many pucks as he did with the Panthers.

If he stays healthy, which has never been a problem, Luongo should post another 65-70-appearance season. Mika Noronen, who was acquired from Buffalo at the trade deadline, decided to play overseas instead of being a rarely-used backup, so veteran Wade Flaherty will likely be the understudy.

WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE - The Canucks turned over a decent portion of their roster, but will it work? Luongo was the upgrade of all upgrades, but, as he proved in Florida a stud goaltender cannot carry a team to the playoffs all by himself.

Now, instead of having questions in goal the team has questions up front and on defense. How those questions are answered will determine whether or not the Canucks will again be outside the playoff field, or whether they can squeeze in as a seventh or eighth seed.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Hi


Thank you all for reading this blog. I must say I'm impressed that you would take the time. I do a lot of deleting because I get carried away. But when an uncle has a wierd mind and relatives like you it's tough not to get carried away. Every one of you is special to me. I've got two brothers and one brother-in-law who are the greatest persons in the history of mankind and nine nephews and nieces whom are hmm, what is the word, unique. Kevin could be slightly more unique than anyone else on this planet but I shouldn't single him out. And I'm pretty sure you all would agree with me.
Take care and have a good week everyone. Life is short so make the best of it. When I bike to work in the morn I will be thinking of each and every one of you. That makes my day.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

The Ryder Cup

Darren Clarke lost his wife to cancer a short time ago. Watching the Europeans win the cup and seeing Mr. Clarke crying on his caddy's shoulder was heartwarming to say the least.

I worry


I'm not terribly impressed with Jim, Kevin and Colin going hunting for a week but I would assume there will be a few laughs had during that week. As long as there is no wildlife killed then how bad can it be? If there is don't tell me. In fact if Kev actually killed something I wouldn't talk to him for 25 years. Jim, well he still has that hunter instinct. The Neanderthals had it and it's tough to let it go I guess. And why Colin is going hunting I'm not sure. Colin is going to kill something? If he accidently did, I wouldn't talk to him for a hundred years (if he lives that long).

But I shouldn't worry. Hello. I should probably worry more about them accidently killing each other. I presume Kevin will be naked for the week and out hunting at 3am. I've never seen him carry a gun with clothes on in the daylight, I hope it isn't too nippy. I shouldn't worry too much though, Jim's e-mail to me:

"Actually it is kevin, colin and I hunting for a week, next week actually. Staying in a travel trailer, hot tub, granny made up cabbage rolls, beef stew, chicken pot pies, etc, should be good!"

Let's get together here: remember the days when Jim would go out alone and spend 12 days sitting in one spot while waiting for a deer to appear? And now he's got a hot tub, travel trailer and cabbage rolls? What happened to our fearless hunter? I'm an old fashioned person and a hunting trip should entail a little bit of deprivation. But not with Jim anymore apparently. If I ever cross the Gobi Desert I want Jim with me. I assume by the end of the week the deer will be in the hot tub and the three muskateers will be lost somewhere in the woods.

If I ever go on a hunting trip there are two persons whom I wouldn't want with me: Kevin and Colin. One can assume that the wildlife are dancing around and clapping their hooves with glee knowing those two persons are on the way to their forest.

The week from Colin's perspective:

Day one: "Gee Dad this is fun, when do we get to leave?" "Shaddup and keep loading the gear. How many rocket launchers have you uncrated?" "one" "throw it in the trunk" "then there will be no room for the Wiser's". "forget the rocket launcher, the grenade launcher will have to do, did you remember our swimming trunks for the hot tub, and don't forget the sour cream for the cabbage rolls, and above all don't forget the wine glasses, oh yeah and the camoflauge outerwear and your Bud" "I think I'm going to have fun roughing it Dad and to think we are going hunting with a famous hunter like Uncle Jim" "exactly, have we got room for an E-Z Boy?"

Day two: "Dad?" "yes" "I don't see Uncle Jim, it's 5am, can he be out hunting already?" "possibly, he does like to reconoiter" "Dad isn't that a nice deer over there, a six pointer I would say, why is he not afraid of us?" "he knows we aren't going to shoot him, but if that was a cat I could shoot it" "we are on a deer hunting trip aren't we Dad?" "yes" "that is a deer" "true" "but we aren't going to shoot it?" "are you crazy or something?" "I'm confused"

Day three: "Dad?" "yes" Uncle Jim has been sitting behind that bush since we told him Chuck the Six Pointer was in camp and he hasn't moved since" "ignore him, turn up the temp on the hot tub and pass me another chicken pot pie" "what if Chuck appears and Jim shoots him?" "what are the chances of that?" "remote"

Day four: "Dad" "yes" "do you like eating deer?" "no, it's too gamey for me" "Chuck agrees with you" "where is he by the way I haven't seen Chuck or Jim for a few days" "I'm not sure, Uncle Jim said something about tracking spoors and Chuck has gone to the high country for a few days to visit his friends, the bighorn sheep" "I miss Chuck"
Day five: "Dad" "yes" "I think we have to hunt for Uncle Jim" "we are parked in a paved parking lot for gawds sakes, six miles from Cranbrook, no one can get lost, he'll show up, the Wiser's is running low, maybe we should visit Brenda, Jim will never notice we are gone, he's got the spoor thing to worry about"
Last day: "Dad" "yes" "we gotta do this next year, we'll invite Uncle Don" "Uncle Don doesn't do hunting" "aah, well, I forgot about that"

The Classic Series



































































Some pictures need to be posted more than once. These are only a few of them. I could not survive without Ger, Julie, Bob, Rob, and Neil sending me pictures. And Ger is a virgo. He understands me completely. I must admit that I am up there in oddness. I have to temper my brain for public consumption but I know whatever I write, Ger will get it. That is the highest compliment I can give to a person.


Thank you

Yay


I haven't been feeling up to par, but I really appreciate everyone looking at the blog. The Douvilles are winning the race as far as pictures go but it's close. If Ger sends some soon then it's tied. I know it takes some effort to send pictures so I feel honoured. Neil sent some great ones, some of which I've posted and more to come. This is an e-mail which I think is beautiful:

'New Denver was great! We went the night before and stayed at a B & B - very quiet old, big farmhouse. The garlic fest was extremely busy with about 7,000 people thru the gates. We sold just under 400 lbs of garlic and even a few onions. We are now into hockey season - Karen and I have both started playing with our teams. Marcel on the midget rep team for his last year, and he's also playing on the school volleyball team. They won their first tourny of the year last weekend here. Nice to see him play well. Next year at this time we'll be empty-nesters. Hard to believe. Colleen is in Regina this weekend at a big college tourny'.

I tend to think of Marlene and Anna and them telling me how difficult it was to see the last one go. Can anyone imagine Gail leaving home? Well, I would have killed myself. And Julie? I couldn't survive.

I certainly will regret it when the Canucks lose this year. We've got Roy, Kev, Col and Robin to consider, and dear departed Max. But I'm cheering for the Maple Loafs. I know I'm a softie and can be cajoled into almost anything by my nephews, but I will not switch allegiance.

I just want to say a special hello to Anita and Ty. Good people.

Saturday, September 23, 2006

The Family

For me this could be the greatest picture in the history of mankind. I look at the kids and see the Douville and Storm family. And Gail is showing off her kneecaps. And Karen too.
It must run in the family. I'm thinking of Bob's kneecaps, but perhaps he's been outdone.
Thank you Robin, great pic. Colleen is in Regina this weekend at a volleyball tourny.

Hi Kev

It looks like the Europeans will win. Many golf writers predicted the U.S. would win. I know we didn't, the Europeans have the heart and soul and the Americans don't. Maybe this is obvious but any golfer playing against an American is going to focus.

Imagine (thanks John)


Imagine there's no heaven
Or no hell below
above only sky
Imagine there's no countries
Or no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living a life in peace
You may say I'm a dreamer
Imagine a world with no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger, a Brotherhood of Man

Friday, September 22, 2006

An optical illusion





I presume it is an optical illusion that it is Friday. I hope not. I took a new route home from work on my bike tonight. I enjoy seeing parts of TO that I never have seen before in my twenty-some years of living here. Of course the problem being is that I'm in rush hour traffic so I don't get a lot of chances to look around and gawk at the surroundings. I guess because I leave for work at 7am and Toronto is a 9-5 city but gawd the difference between biking to work and biking home is quite different. Up until a couple of weeks ago I enjoyed the bike to work more because it was a hell of a lot more peaceful (a lot less traffic). It's been a subtle and gradual change but now I enjoy the bike home more. I don't think that is particularly a good thing. I'm kind of getting to be a maniac on two wheels (if it's possible for a sixty-year old person to be a maniac). Of course many cyclists still wizz by me It doesn't bother me too much really. I'm not great, speed-wise, at going up the three steep hills that I encounter going to and from work. But fewer cyclists are passing me now. Not bad, I guess, for a sixty-one year old guy who loves his family from afar. Which is not a bad thing. I could of course just catch a bus out there on the spur of the moment and arrive on one of my family member's doorsteps: "hi, it's moi" "whom?" "moi" "hi uncle don, are you passing through?". "not really, I'm here to stay" "where?" "here" "for how long?" "forever" "forever?" "well at least until I pass away" "how long will that be?" "my heart is palpalating so it could be any minute now"
If you click on any of these pics you will get a full-screen image of course. For me, the bottom one is the wierdest. Not a thing moves, but it moves. I may be an optical illusion actually. I feel that way sometimes.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Wierd People

Yay Loretta. Her and Karrie are normal. They like to canoe. They like to get on the river and canoe and take it all in (yes I see Justin, he's cute) The bald eagle, the moose, they even paddled (what is the difference between an oar and a paddle by the way?).

Jim likes to think that the July long weekend is an outdoor adventure. It is that. But when me and Kevin canoe by the crowd because it's too raucous, you know it's a party too.

Being from Toronto and living the hustle and bustle, it would not be a bad thing to experience the quietude of the Moyie and just listening to nature. So far it hasn't happened. Which is a good thing of course.

But a couple of canoes (at the most) and peace and quiet would be nice too someday. Just me and the river and a bald eagle. When I bike to work I think how nice that would be.

Agh

I don't know why I look stunned. Apparently stunned is my natural pose. And I never take my shirt off, it must have been really hot that day. Is that Shayna? She is so cute. Yay. I just realized something. I'm whiter than Kev. Kev looks bronzed next to me. I guess the biking thing working. That is slightly heartening. This week I made another hole in my belt so my pants stay up.

I put off the doctor's appointment again until next month. I think I was supposed to go in April and I keep putting it off. What is she going to tell me? I presume it will be quit smoking, drinking beer and ogling young women. I have to have a bit of fun don't I? I suppose if I have to I can quit the beer and cigarettes. If my eyes go then I jump off the nearest tall building.

I sometimes wonder if I shouldn't at least remember one of these pictures being taken. I don't remember Ger even having a camera with him. I remember him talking. That I remember. Ger seems to have the inordinate talent of capturing uncles in wierd poses.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Hello


This picture says it all. This is a great, great picture. Actually this picture makes my day, week, month and year and maybe the century. I love everyone in the world. All persons, everyone. In the history of mankind. So everyone can tell me I'm good for nothing. If someone was threatening me with an uzi and I had to tell someone who whom my favourite persons might be, it might be these three. Proba bly not much doubt about that. I pretty well think they know that too.

The string theory




In spite of these two dregs from society, there is a way to treat younger persons. Treat them with respect.


Even these two. Which is tough. Hello. See all the hustle and bustle in the background? They are ignoring it, yay my people. Where was I by the way? I don't see me. Shouldn't I have been somewhere in the picture?


My theory is that the first canoe trip is great. The second one is the best....and it only get's better. But of course the young persons have to deal with the old persons (like Ger and Kev). Whom are loony. Hello. No not really, seeing Col drive up that hill to try to straighten his bumper was rather exciting and everything worked out.


My theory is that a lot of work goes in to the canoe weekend. For the rest of the year one can leave, but not then, put up with the foibles of our family, sit back and enjoy it. But of course if we all did that it wouldn't be fun. Continue on. Do what you do.


And of course one of the great things about the canoe weekend was Justin. I was impressed. But the thing is don't worry about the old persons. They are crazy Hello. They need a little outing once a year. If Ger can't get annoyed at Karri and Kev can't hide under a tire at least once a year then the string will be broken. Maybe one of my fave times during the weekend was listening to Ger talk about Karri. Maybe one has to travel 5000 km's to appreciate how funny that is. And Kevin of course. And Jim. I hesitate to say anything but I must. Enjoy every moment of it. Hello. Col might have tried to impress me and he did (see pic above). My theory is: like father like son. I don't know why persons in the family have sudden urges to impress me. I wouldn't bother, the pain is worse than the gain.

Hello


I may be moving to Vancouver soon. Not sure I can take another winter in Toronto. I don't think so.

Hello


I try. But it was Cummings not Riondel where Leo had his 70th. This is Devon of course. Who is going to be 21 in June.
May I just quietly kill myself. I remember Neil when he was an annoying young person who didn't mind me too much. It doesn't seem that long ago.
I'm going to bike a lot today. Or kill myself, one of the two.
Amazing really.

Friday, September 15, 2006

A touch of class

Aah Lorraine. Lorraine loves children, dogs and, I hope, elderly persons (not mentioning any names). Lorraine is a complete pleasure to be around and she 'gets' everything that Bob and I might joke about and she is waaay ahead of us but me and Bob don't talk about that.
Bob is classy too. He's showing off his right kneecap for the camera. My eyes wanted to look at the beautiful fountain in the background (or on Bob's and Lorraine's new puppy, isn't he cute), but no, the focus is on Bob's kneecap. I'm thinking if you compare Bob's kneecaps to Kevin's kneecaps, Bob wins. I didn't mind Neil's kneecaps actually. Ger might win the nice kneecap contest though, I've seen his. They are up there.

..and a little 'touched'

I resent this pic. I was as one with the flora and fauna for a moment or two. I'm thinking this is the only chance I can away. I would have walked farther into the flora and fauna but it was rocky terrain and Kev was in a rush.
I was trying to emulate The Great Grand Poobah's: Look off into the distance and appear to know something (the pillow under my t-shirt is probably rather obvious). I had sixteen seconds to pose for this shot and it is hard to make a pillow look like a stomach so quickly. I'm hoping the Great Grand Poobah's will forgive me for this. Only The Great Grand Poobah's can look like Great Grand Poobahs.

And I was thinking at the time, which really put me out of the running for The Great Grand Poobah.

Neil

This is a picture of Neil taken this past March at Little Shovel Pass near Jasper. Neil and three friends set up a camp and Neil slept for five nights in a snow cave in -25 Celsius temperatures (I'm not making this up).

Neil is wondering what that funny-looking, hairy creature walking up the other side of the mountain is. He's thinking it's either a yeti or the snow-blindness combined with the high-altitude lack of oxygen he's experiencing.

Isn't he cute? (Neil, not the Yeti)

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Leo's 70th Birthday


This and the picture below were taken at Riondel on the occasion of Leo's 70th birthday.
Lookin' good!

Neil is the one with the mustache and cute legs.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

The new arrival


This a beautiful picture of Brandy and Makala.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Hi all (revised)


Kev and Anita are going to be grandparents. Clear the deck. How will they be as grandparents? Just make sure I'm not in the neighbourhood. Anita will be great, cooing to the child. I assume when Col drops off the child for the first time, Kev will pretty well go ballistic. Not in the nuclear sense of course but more of the time bomb waiting to go off sense.

Kev isn't prepared for grandparenthood is he? He could well be. But if I see that child following his grandfather around the house while Kev's trying to get his shit together and discussing what vehicle is to driven by whom, I'm going sweep him away (the child, not Kev).

The Canucks


Here's the Canuck's logo. It's nice if one is blind in one eye and can't see out of the other. Apparently the Canuck front office is going to get Ronald MacDonald to come out of retirement for the first pre-season game this season (against Detroit on October 5).
They reduced their training camp roster by seventeen players so they will take only 50 players to the main training camp in Vernon. Among the 17 was Vladimer Petrokowskoffski, who is still in Russia looking for his Visa.

Progress

So I upgraded my blog to add a few new features, but unfortunately I can't upload pictures at the moment. Oops, I just cleared my cache and what should appear? One thing I have noticed is the number on the Profile Views. When I first started the blog the number of people viewing the blog would climb very slowly, but it would move. Then I put a google search on one of my sub-blogs (google pays one for every hit), and the number on the profile views stopped. It moved once a month by one or two. Now that I've upgraded, the number of hits on the blog are going up like crazy. I don't have that many relatives to account for it.

So for privacy reasons I will be more careful in the future, to wit:

An unnamed person has a huge unnamed flora in his/her yard/acreage.

A person, who shall remain nameless, yaks/gabs/goes on a lot.

The Great Grand Supremo, but Incognito Poobah is having his/her 34th/35th/36th nap of the day.

The Great (up and coming) Grand Supremo, and also Incognito Poobah is thinking of the moose/meese he just about bagged back in '82.

Ju...oops, Jane Doe is somewhat perplexed. She is wondering about life in general and/or specifically. Or not. Ask Jane Doe not me.

A younger brother, a.k.a. Wilfrid, is having a problem with his palm pilot. The pilot in his palm is having trouble navigating.

An annoying and/or irritating nephew who grows an unnamed herb is going to cheer for The Leafs and/or The Leafs and/or The Leafs this winter.









Uncle Do..oops sidney.

Friday, September 08, 2006

Fridays

I always look forward to Fridays as far biking home from work goes. I have no idea why but there is more traffic and people behind the steering wheels are more anxious to get home and chill out. I love it because I've gotta be a little more aware and my adrenelin gets going good and I'm in a rush too. The first stretch is just autos zooming by me and they are going hell bent for leather...to get into traffic jam. Hello.

The second stretch is nothing but hills and a lot of the lanes are turning off into side streets and I have to get between the vehicles turning off and those are going straight ahead. Sometimes I get in between a bus and a gravel truck and I'm stopped at light and I think: I know one has to turn right and the other has to go straight, gee I feel small. And I'm trying to bike up a steep hill, they just have to step on the gas.

The third stretch is the most interesting by far. Up until now I was in the 'burbs more or less. Now I'm in the 'crazy' part of town: two lanes, cars parked on either side, pedestrians going hither and thither (no one pays attention to crosswalks in this part of town and mainly most all Torontonians ignore them) and so the danger is hitting a pedestrian or someone opening their car door. It's beautiful though. All along this stretch (of Ukranians, then Koreans, then Italians, then chinese, etc.) are small shops that cater to their own community. Toronto really is a big city of small communities.

The fourth stretch is a calm one (because it actually has a bike lane) but an interesting one. It's on a street called Harbord. The first part is where mainly Portugese live and then it disects Spadina which is Chinatown and then it goes through St. George St. which is all about the University of Toronto. The ivied buildings and the students milling about. And then Harbord Street runs into Queen's Park which means the Ontario legislative buildings and it gets confusing (it took me a while to figure out the best bike route through this little stretch).

And the final stretch. Disecting Bay, Yonge, Church, Jarvis, Sherbourne, and then finally Parliament Streets. It sounds like a long way, but I usually make it home in an hour. Fridays though, I get home and say: "I survived, yay, that was a lot of fun"

Sunday, September 03, 2006

An Addendum

I can't help it but it was funee: So I'm watching Ger and Jim heading off to the trailer as me and Kev are talking around Jim's campfire. I'm thinkin': they are leaving us, how the hell are me and Kev going to make it up that big hill, and I gotta catch a plane in an hour or two. Four o'clock in the morn and Kev is nattering, well it may have been me. "Kev, there is no one around, we have to walk up there by ourselves". "whom?" "Your brothers left us to our own devices and I'm not confident about making it to Jim's trailer" "Hang on to me, Uncle Don, I'll show you the way" Hello. So we start off and Kev veers. "Kev where are you?" "help" "where are you?" "look for the person amidst the flora and fauna" "Kev, I feel a sense of deja-vu, didn't we go through this on the canoe trip?" "are you going to help me up, shaddup" "By the way that was an amazing feat of tumbling, did you know you could do that, I'd give you ten out of ten on that" "how much farther?" "we just started, here we go, hang on to me Kev" Veer. "I'm going to insist Jim make a firepit closer to his trailer, like in his living room, by the where are you?" "I'm checking out Brenda's landscaping up close" "How is it?" "painful".

Hello

Is there any Storm Clan member not going a have child soon? Can we have a conference? I love children but do we need them all at once? The idea of it is to spread them out a little.

Kristen/Jim and Col/Jen will have the cutest kids in the history of mankind. Which is a good thing I suppose. And Brandy (of whom I'm awaiting pics). There's other's I'm sure, I can't keep track anymore. I'm going to open a day care centre in the Kootenays/Okanagan area, I'll be rich. Hello.

I saw Kristen a summer or two ago, I've never felt more comfortable with someone in my life. And Colin. He's got me figured out. Life is happening as it should. Kev as a grandfather. That can't be a good thing. Hello. A conversation between Kev and his grandchild-to-be: "coo" "coo?" "coo" It won't be a long conversation. Hello. I'm hoping when him and Anita babysit he won't give the child any bad habits. "I'm changing your diapers, but I"m above this, I'm not a bad person, I'm watching the Discovery Channel and rhinos are humping, I'm covering your eyes". "And I have nuns coming over and they are taking you to Tibet and that may be too close". "coo" "don't argue, you'll love sipping herbal tea".

Life


David Letterman's Top Ten List of Unanswerable Questions:
10: Why do I always get in the slowest line-up at the grocery store?
09. Why are the worst drivers persons who drive for a living?
08. Why can't lightning strike in the same place twice?
07. Why is Paris Hilton in the news every day?
06. Why do I miss Pat Quinn?
05. Why do I have more confidence in nurses than doctors?
04. Why does Kev enjoy being naked, armed and dangerous at 3:45 am?
03. Why does Ger continue to be annoying?
02. Why does Jim keep putting up with Kev and Ger?
01. why the hell does the Great, Grand, Historic, Somewhat Odd If Not Crazed Uncle Don continue to think they are worthy?

Bob and Lorraine


A picture Bob sent me in January of 2005 when they were in L.A.

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Ger (revised)

If anyone cares to look, that landscape behind Ger is amazing. The light was perfect and it looks like a painting not a photo. I've never seen Kootenay Lake and the mountains look like that before. Which is an appropriate lead-in to wish Ger a happy birthday. A talented person who should be put away, I mean honoured.

In honour of Ger and the family I wrote the following. As I've said before, even I think I'm strange:

Which heritage your sperm doth evolve? The angelic side of your spermeth dids't evolve because a crazy swede set sail to North America and ended up in Saskatchewan. Thereby meeting a Darling person (get it?) who entwined to produce three boys and a girl. The eldest of the boys (King Roy The Twelfth) met a dasterdly family in Creston who were run out of Ireland because they couldn't run a grain mill quite right. But somehow the eldest son met the sweetest damsel (Queen Anna The Only) and they settled down into a life of bliss. Short lived, alas, James The First arrived and storm clouds arrived. A decree was bespoken and no more children would be allowed to populate the kingdom. Eek, another child was born, Gerald The Gellyroll. This child was larger than life, and caused a great deal of pain to the township far and wide. It took eight horses and a biiiig wagon to just transport the child to the potty. The call went out to the citizens of the estate. The Lord and Lady have finished with the family thingst. Eek. Her ladyness was with another child? The exhausted mid-wife trudged through the snow to deliver the cutest little bundle of pink. They named him Sir Kevin The Cute. The celebration was short-lived however when it was discovered that Sir Kevin The Cute was borne at 12:01 on Hallowed-Ween. Hello. Discussions were held around the round table. Sir Galahad suggested moving Hallowed-Ween to September fourth and calling it Labour Day in honour of the serfs. But Sir Lancelot prevailed and said to King Roy The Twelfth, what can happen? Hello. So thanks to Sir Kevin The Cute we have ten billion little Elvis impersonators knocking on doors asking for candy on October 31st.

Aah, as the bells pealed in town it was announced another childe was expected, the crowd roared: "not another boy: no more, we are done, finito, ". Hallejuhah, blessed be thy name. After the town crier lost his voice, the milkmaid turned religious, the blacksmith turned white, and the mid-wife died of exhaustion, a girl was borne to the kingdom. They named her Dame Julie in memory of Mother Julie of Gwynhennach. But Hail Mary, unlike her brothren, the youngest childe wast quiet and subdued. The townfolk rushed to praise His and her Highness for such an act of worthiness upon their village green. The air was joyous, the celebrations were raucous and Dame Julie was given a welcome fit for a very small and very poor kingdom (they couldn't even afford a moat).