Sunday, May 20, 2007

Questions

Why do dogs seem to like me? Hello. The guys upstairs has got two of them and I drive him crazy because they seem to like me more than him. I wouldn't imagine him being crazy and completely nuts would have anything to do with it of course. This is the best place I've lived in Toronto (old Victorian house, quiet, nice landlord) so I'll regret leaving it. But I do have two insane persons living in the house. But they have always left me alone. I'll miss them.

Why does Jesse Green of the New York Times want my e-mail address when I move? I put him through hell in the last few years. When I get a few beer in me I have no borders. He's rich and he's interviewed every famous person that exists. He's angst-ridden and I'm angst-ridden and I can write words every bit as good as him so no surprise.

Why do I love my family? I'm slightly biased but I think Bob is cute. He can be annoying but so could Mother Teresa. And he's got a heart of gold. And he puts up with me which is good.

Why in the hell do I not mind Ger, Jim and Kev. This is not a new question. I've asked it a trillion times. I'm not a physicist but I have come up with a theory: d=&^ 6+2+1 squared. In laymans terms that means they should be tortured for up to six months before one kills them. And of course one can add Robin and Neil, whom should be tortured for an additional month because they are extra cute.

How will I survive? I won't. I've been given an ultimatum from Kevin: Uncle don you have to quit a bad habit. "which one?" 'we'll discuss it over a toke, cigarette and a beer"

Why do I love Anita: I think she is completely annoying but maybe not. I've really grown to love Brenda, Kerri, and Anita. Especially since I've noticed that Jim, Ger and Kev aging so quickly. I'll need friends.

Why do I think that having Shawn e-mail me and asking when I'd be out there to bike may be the greatest compliment I've ever had: "yeah biking would be alot of fun. I got a bike too now so when you come down maby we can go biking somewhere". It would be tough not to feel good about that e-mail. And it will be nice to see Colin and Tyler. I'm not a 'sittting around the kitchen table and rehashing things that have been said already'-type person. I can survive it but my attention will wander, probably within six seconds. Yay hah. Hopefully there will be deer around. I'll pet them: And then I'll bike to Gerry's: "Ger?" "yes uncle don?" "I've biked over to your place for sanity, hello, it was a little insane at Kevins, and I'm a roving reporter, what have you got to report. Oh my God you've re-done the kitchen in a Spanish motif and you have three flamingo dancers in your hallway" So I'll rove over to Justins. "justin?" "yes uncle don" "any news of note?" "I'm a father" "when can I interview the child and Shayna, it's too bad you are related to Ger"