Sunday, October 08, 2006

Uncle don's top ten trite sayings

I hope I don't sound too cynical below but being a virgo and being angst-ridden I'm sure you will all forgive me.

10. "you only live once". I actually used this not that long ago on someone. They felt better for two and a half seconds.

09. "a bird in hand is better than two in the bush". If it's pigeons I'll take two in the bush anytime.

08. "save it for a rainy day". Some persons latch onto that concept. I'm not one of them.

07. "sticks and stones can break my bones.....". Wouldst it be that simple. Words can be a lot more painful.

06. "giving is better than receiving". Well, if I had to choose one, I'd pick receiving.

05. "nothing ventured, nothing gained". Hello. Isn't that fairly obvious to anyone with half a brain.

04. "the early bird get's the worm". Personally, I haven't developed a taste for worms yet so I'll let the early birds have them.

03. "where there is a will there a way". I'd like to kill the person who came up with this saying. One needs a lotta luck and determination and will. None of which I particularly have.

02. "a friend in need is a friend indeed". This makes a little sense.

01. "absence makes the heart grown fonder". Amen


I hope there is a writer in one of the new Storms. Has anywone noticed but me that all new Storm baby's appear completely shocked when they are little. Except in Ger's case. We were all shocked at him. Ta da.


It is not a bad thing to care about family. 99.99% of the time I'm ignored but it is that .01% of the time I live for. The Storm's/Douville's are completely special. Odd but special. Bob and Lorraine are off to England and Poland on Tuesday for two weeks. I'm pretty sure no one realizes how hard I work on weekends to make a dollar or two on writing and so the Storm blog is a good change for me.

Kevin will hate this but I consider him one of the great persons of all time. Other than morning and lunch and pretty well all the time before and after. The poor baby. Hello: "we have to be quiet during lunch hour because Kev's home and he needs his soup and nap" Hello, the rest of world doesn't need a soup and nap, why does he? Because he is feeding the pigs. He doesn't have any pigs. I know Uncle Don but he has to feed them.

"What else is ascue with Kev neet?" "He likes to get up naked and eat at 3 am" "thus the soup and nap later on in the day?" "yes" "it would be so easy to smother him in his sleep wouldn't it, especially around 12:15"

And Kevin writes down our score before we throw the darts. That annoys me. If one has any sense of rules, do not go to Kevins. Cribbage should not be tinkered with but he does. Although I'm not very good at card games. I think I have a brain but apparently not when it comes card games. But thank God Kevin adapts to my low level of thinking: "yes uncle don you can play that card but try to remember this is darts we are playing". And it is nice to see Ger and Justin together. I'm not sure if anyone appreciates them as much as me. Of course anyone that does 'get' them is loony and crazy and mixed-up and should be put away for 25 years minimum. And should have their head examined.

I talked to Anita on Friday. She said something that made my head spin. I have dreams and maybe some of them will come true. I actually blubbered (hopefully I hid it well) when I was on the canoe trip because I was so happy to be around family. Maybe it wouldn't be a bad thing to have a Storm/Douville reunion although I woudn't survive, I'd have to be carried off in a stretcher. Think about it: me surrounded by Donna, Gail, Laurie, Robin and Neil and Leo, and Bob and Lorraine and Dawn and Craig and Derek and Jim, Ger, Julie, Kevin and Roy. And Colin, Ty, Justin, and Kristin and all the rest of the family. And if one thinks about it, if everyone showed up, that would be quite a crowd. I talked to Leo on Friday and he cheered me up so much.

I really like to be off the radar screen in life but I find it so difficult to do so when it comes to family. I imagine you all know that by now. I like my beer, I like my biking, I like my family, and above all I like writing.